Promise of a Lifetime
by gypsywriter135
Summary: Germany remembers.


I am so proud of this!

I honestly think that it's one of my best works ever! :D It only took me a few hours, and then I came back to it, re-wrote some stuff, and then proof-read it (GASP!) and I don't mean to toot my own horn, but it's fucking amazing! :D

I surprise myself sometimes...

So I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! :D

**_Warnings: Rated for swearing and mentions of Germancest. If you don't like those parts, then don't read._**

**Disclaimer: "Hetalia" STILL isn't mine... :(**

* * *

><p>Germany remembers his first memory.<p>

It's a little hazy around the edges, and everything else sort of blurs together.

He remembers blinking open his eyes and looking up at a large, dark ceiling, feeling a weird sensation in his head. Hearing a rustling to his side, he had turned his head to see a man standing in the doorway to a large room, nothing but a bed and a mirror in the corner. He had blinked again.

"You finally woke up," the man had said in an odd accent, making his way over to Germany, who had realized by this time that he was lying down in a large, soft bed with a cool rag on his forehead. He had watched as the man came to edge of the darkness and the dim light that was being emitted from the small bed lamp on the nightstand next to the bed.

"Who are you?" Germany remembers asking, a little surprised to hear the same accent come from his own mouth. "Who am I…?"

The man hadn't come any closer. "You don't remember?" he asked, and Germany could remember hearing a little disappointment in the voice.

Germany had thought long and hard about the man's question. "No…" he said slowly. "Who am I?"

"Your name is Germany," the man had responded. "You are a new nation."

Germany remembers nodding. "Who are you?"

"I am your big brother," the man had told him. Germany had scrunched up his face.

"And what is your name?" he remembers asking.

The man had chuckled. "So curious." He had stepped forward then. "My name is Prussia."

Germany's first memory is filled of a strong presence, pale skin with even paler hair, and red eyes that seemed glow in the dark from the light.

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Germany remembers his first injury.

He remembers standing on the top of the tall ladder on his tip-toes, reaching towards the tallest shelf in the library towards a thick book. He remembers feeling the ladder shift to the side with his weight as he reached farther and farther, tongue sticking out between two soft, pink lips. He remembers the feeling of confusion as he teetered sideways a little too far and then nothing, the book he wanted just brushing his fingers as he fell to the ground.

Germany remembers hitting the floor on his back, knocking the air out of him, and blinking upwards as a small avalanche of thick books came tumbling towards him and landing on his stomach. He remembers feeling a pain in his leg and something wet quickly soaking his pants. He remembers tears forming in his eyes as he caught his breath and shoved books off himself.

He remembers the soft sound of hurried footsteps coming closer and the library door opening, Prussia standing in the doorway, looking at him with a mixture of confusion, anger, and worry. He had watched as the other nation had run a calculating eye over the scene before huffing and striding with long steps over to the younger boy. He remembers the albino kneeling down and shifting him out of the books, looking over him as he did so.

"What happened?" he asked tersely, eyebrows scrunched in that way that Germany remembers oh, so vividly.

"I was trying to reach a book," Germany had sniffed, looking at his leg, where a small red stain was growing.

Prussia had snorted and maneuvered him so that he was sitting against the shelves. The older man had carefully pulled the pant leg over Germany's leg. Germany remembers crying out.

"Don't be a baby," Prussia had scolded coldly. "I was right in the middle of an important meeting."

"Sorry…" Germany had replied, wiping his face with his sleeve.

"Don't say you're sorry," Prussia had snapped, making Germany jump. Prussia had inspected his leg, which must have gotten caught on the edge of the ladder on his fall down to earth. "It's a sign of weakness."

Germany remembers nodding, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over again.

Prussia had stood. "I'll go get the first aid kit. Stay here," he commanded, and quickly but calmly made his way out into the hall and disappeared.

While he was gone, Germany remembers trying to compose himself before he returned. He hadn't wanted another lecture.

Prussia had returned a few minutes later and had kneeled in his previous spot, rummaging in the kit for a moment before producing a cotton ball and a bottle. He poured some of the liquid on the ball and gently scrubbed the wounded area. Germany remembers wincing with pain.

"Hold still," Prussia had spat. "Or I'll poor the whole bottle on it."

Germany had nodded and tried his hardest not to squirm from the pain. He remembers the blood magically disappearing and Prussia wrapping a small thing of gauze around his calf with long, nimble fingers.

Prussia had stood then, kicking the first aid kit closed. He had glared down at the boy. "Clean this up. Just put the books on the table in the corner and then get yourself cleaned up. I don't want to see you until dinner."

Germany remembers nodding and turning away, tears gathering in his eyes once more. He remembers Prussia leaving to return to his meeting.

He had stacked the books on the table, like Prussia had told him too, and then carried the first aid kit to the bathroom, where he set it on the counter. He had never actually gotten the book he had wanted to read and now had nothing to do until dinner, which was still a few hours away.

He remembers falling asleep until the dinner bell rang. He remembers hurrying to the dining hall, not wanting to upset his brother even more. But when he had arrived to find the hall empty, one of the servants had informed him that Prussia had gone out with his guest for the evening.

Germany remembers sighing and climbing into his chair, surprised when a large book sat next to his plate. Closer examination had revealed it to be the one he had been trying to reach earlier that day.

Germany remembers the pain of his first injury, but he also remembers gentle fingers and an unorthodox way of feeling better.

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Germany remembers his first nightmare.

He remembers bolting up in bed, lightening flashing outside his window as he breathes harshly, eyes wide and trembling in the darkness of his room. He remembers the thunder booming and immediately burying himself under the covers, trying to block out the noise by scrunching his eyes closed.

He remembers another thunderclap, this one shaking the floor of the entire house. He remembers thinking for a moment before grabbing his stuffed eagle and sprinting across the room, ripping the door open and running down the hall at a dead run.

He remembers the feeling of fear as the darkness seems to engulf him, the lightening making the shadows chase after him, reminding him of the monsters in his dreams. He remembers wrenching open a large wooden door, slamming it shut and making the person in the bed in the room shoot up, curses streaming from their mouth.

"What the fuck?" Prussia had snarled, reaching over to flick on his bedside lamp. His posture had relaxed when his eyes landed on Germany, but his face scrunched up into a glare. "What the fuck are you doing?"

Germany remembers being plastered to the wooden door at his back, eagle clutched to his chest and breathing heavily. He remembers Prussia's glare softening ever-so-slightly.

"Do you know what time it is?" Prussia had growled. He ran an eye over the young boy. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Germany remembers shaking. "I… I had a nightmare…." he had muttered.

Prussia had gazed at him for a long time, expression unreadable. Germany remembers being to scared to actually move. The light from the lamp made him feel a little better, but the lightening and thunder outside still made the monsters seem all too real.

"What do you want me to do about it?" Prussia had finally asked.

Germany remembers shaking. "I… I don't know…" he had whispered.

Again, Prussia had stared at him before grunting in annoyance. He had lain back down and turned with his back to the younger boy. "Fine. You can sleep here tonight. But don't expect this type of treatment all the time. You're gonna have to learn to get over this stupid fear. Monsters aren't real."

Germany remembers watching the immobile form of his brother for a moment before scampering across the room and climbing into the giant bed, settling under the covers and curling around his eagle, his brother's back against his own.

"Turn off the damn light," Prussia had growled, shifting slightly.

Germany looked up and reached towards the lamp, pulling the chain and dowsing the room in darkness, the storm still raging outside and lightening spilling into the room.

Prussia had turned over after a while to lie on his stomach, one arm thrown over Germany, who was still awake. The albino had pulled the boy closer to him, Germany fitting perfectly next to him.

Germany remembers the feeling of fear of that night, but he also remembers the comfort and love as he had drifted off to sleep, safely protected by strong arms.

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Germany remembers his first argument with his brother.

He remembers screaming at Prussia, who yelled right back. He remembers punching Prussia in the jaw, and the look of shock as Germany stepped backwards.

He remembers running out of the room, going to hide under the staircase.

He remembers staying there for several hours, thinking about what happened.

He remembers when a small, yellow bird lands in front of him and begins to chirp softly. A few minutes later, Prussia's feet appeared in front of him.

"Germany?" he had called.

Germany had remained silent, but the little yellow chick chirped again, and Prussia kneeled down to look under the stairs. He sighed.

"Why don't you come out here so we can talk."

Germany remembers blinking in shock at this new side of Prussia. He had never acted this way towards him before.

"I don't want to…" Germany remembers muttering, looking away. He remembers Prussia swearing softly.

"Look, here, brat. I'm trying to be nice. I'm still pissed at the cheap shot you-"

Germany had cut him off by flinging himself at the older man. Prussia stopped midsentence, body tensing.

"I'm sorry," Germany remembers whispering.

Hesitant arms had wrapped around him after a few minutes. It was one of the first times Prussia had allowed physical affection.

"Yeah, yeah…" Prussia had muttered. "But if you ever do it again, I'm going to kick your ungrateful ass."

Germany doesn't remember what their fight was about, but he does remember that Prussia forgave him no matter what happened.

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Germany remembers Austria.

He remembers the first visit to the aristocrat's house with his brother. He remembers the playful banter from the other room and Hungary smiling at him, telling him to take his pick of the sweets on the plate on the counter.

He had never really liked sweets except for German chocolate and black forest cake, but he takes one anyways, just to be polite. He remembers voices rising from the next room through the closed door.

"You are not doing that boy justice!" Austria's voice had yelled.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Prussia's voice boomed.

"It mean's you are corrupting the boy!" Austria had screamed.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, telling me how to raise him?" Prussia had screeched, making Germany wince. He knew that tone; something, or someone, was about to get hurt.

"You are a war mongrel who cares nothing for that boy! All you want is someone who will follow your orders without question!"

The door had flown open, making both Germany and Hungary jump as a red-faced Prussia stormed through. He had stalked over to Germany and hauled him up by the arm, dragging him off the stool he had been sitting on.

"Come on, " he had growled, pulling him towards the door. "We're leaving."

Austria had appeared then, just as upset. Hungary had looked confused.

"I'll make sure that boy is brought up properly," Austria had screamed at their retreating forms.

Prussia had whipped around. "What happened to the last kid you raised, you fucking stupid priss?"

Germany remembers Austria going pale and Hungary covering her mouth with a hand.

"Yeah, that's right. I've already lost one bruder. I'm not about to lose another," he had snarled before slamming the door and shoving Germany down the sidewalk towards their home.

Germany remembers watching Prussia's back, tight with tension, as they walked down the road.

"Bruder?" he had asked.

"What?" Prussia had snapped, shooting him a glare.

"You're… not just training me for me to follow you… right?"

He remembers Prussia stopping so suddenly he almost ran into him. He remembers the older man shaking with rage before deflating. He had run a hand through his silver hair.

Prussia had stared ahead. "Kid, you can do whatever the fuck you want. I'm just making sure that you're strong enough to do it yourself."

Germany had nodded. "I believe in you," he had said.

Prussia had glanced back at him, eyes calculating. "Whatever," he had grumbled before continuing his way back home.

Behind him, Germany smiled.

Germany remembers the first time someone believed he could something on his own, and his own promise on that day.

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Germany remembers his first fight.

He remembers his bloody hair falling into his eyes as France pounded him mercilessly. He remembers trying to back away to find a moment to defend himself, but the blonde man wasn't giving him the chance. He remembers the Frenchman's crazy and deformed laugh as the fists kept coming.

He remembers the feeling of helplessness. He had finally gained enough strength and power to live on his own and what happened? France had taken advantage of him and immediately attacked.

Germany had tried to remember his training with Prussia, but the pain and fists kept his mind from processing a coherent thought.

He remembered thinking that this was the end. He remembered a feeling of hopelessness.

And then the onslaught had stopped.

Germany remembers looking up at his attacker, wondering why the sudden halt, and seeing a blur of blue and red and white and silver. He remembers the shocked look on France's face as he gazed down at the sword currently sticking out of his stomach.

He remembers Prussia standing over the older blonde with a murderous look on his face, red eyes blazing in fury, a slew of German swears and curses flowing from his mouth, face scrunched in a furious snarl.

France had fallen to the ground then, lying on his side, gazing, unseeing, at Germany. Prussia had turned to his brother and hefted him up by the arm, taking on his weight with a grunt. Germany had grown quite a lot and was now just barely shorter than the other man.

Prussia had supported him all the way home, where he had dumped him in bed and stormed out to the bathroom, where he returned a few minutes later with a tub of warm water and several rolls of gauze.

Germany remembers his brother still muttering curses as he patched him up.

"Bruder, why are you here?" he remembers asking.

"Austria called me," the other man had snarled. "Fucking France. Who the fuck does he think he is, attacking a new nation? Always was trying to prove he was worthy…"

Germany remained silent as Prussia finished and then threw a blanket over his form in the bed before walking back to the bathroom, where Germany heard running water.

"Why'd you come, though?" Germany asks when Prussia returns to the room.

Prussia sent him a glare that would have killed a lesser man.

"No one attacks mien bruder and gets away with it."

Germany remembers falling asleep to Prussia's soft curses and the feeling of belonging.

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Germany remembers the first time he gelled his hair.

He had just stepped out of the shower and was trying to shove the blonde bangs out of his face as pulled on a pair pants.

"Hurry the fuck up, West!" his brother called from downstairs. "We're gonna be late!"

Germany had scowled in the mirror at his reflection before sliding a hand through his hair and leaving the bathroom, heading downstairs. Prussia was standing at the bottom of the steps, frowning.

"Gott, could you take any longer?" he growled. "You're like a fucking girl."

"I was trying to look presentable," Germany grumbled, running another hand over his blonde locks. He huffed. "These bangs just keep falling in my eyes."

"Then get a haircut," Prussia snapped, already walking to the door. "Let's go."

The tall German sighed and followed quickly, shutting the door behind him.

They traveled in silence for a long time, nothing but the sound of their footsteps and the rustle of the trees. Germany continued to attempt to get his hair out his face.

After a while, Prussia growled and turned to a side street, hurrying to a small convenient store, where he flung open the door and stomped to one of the aisles. Germany followed, curious and a little embarrassed as the clerk watched them in shock.

"Here," Prussia snapped, shoving a bottle of gel into his brother's hand and pushing him to the store's bathroom. "Make it snappy."

Germany blinked as Prussia turned on his heel towards the clerk, ready to pay for the gel. The tall blonde's mind caught up and he quickly slipped into the bathroom. Flicking on the light, he stared at his reflection from under his bangs, then glanced at the bottle in his hand.

"Might as well try it…" he sighed, and squirted some of the sticky substance into his hand. He rubbed his hands together, then stared at himself in the mirror.

He hadn't known what to do…

He had tried to experiment with different hairstyles, but none of them suited him or kept his hair out of eyes.

"Yo, West!" Prussia had pounded on the door. "Did you fucking drown yourself?"

Germany sighed and wiped his hands off before unlocking the door and coming face to face with an irritated brother.

"I apologize, bruder," he muttered, handing him the bottle of gel back. Prussia took it in slight surprise. "It seems that I cannot find a good use for it."

"It's hair gel," Prussia had growled. "What the fuck is so hard to figure out about it?"

And with that, he opened the bottle and poured a little gel into his hands, rubbed them together, and came towards the younger man. Germany yelped as he backed away and tripped over something (a _manly_ yelp, he remembers), before Prussia's elegant hands were in his hair for a moment, gently pulling and tugging.

"There," Prussia snorted, stepping back and wiping his hands on a nearby towel. "Maybe now we can actually get to this fucking meeting."

Germany blinked once, before realizing that no hair was in his eyes. Fearing the worst, he reached a hand up to his head, worried the brother had made him look dumb- he wouldn't put it passed him.

But his hand only met with hair pulled backwards. He quickly stood and looked in the mirror to find his hair slicked back in a style that fit him. It was practical and easy, while still being neat at the same time.

"Bruder, I…. danke…"

Prussia waved a hand in the air. "Ja, ja. Now let's go before all the good seats are taken."

Germany remembers walking to the meeting that day, a small bottle of gel in his suit pocket, and his Prussia's playful banter echoing around him as he smiled.

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Germany remembers the first time he makes his brother laugh.

He remembers sitting on the outskirts of a battlefield on the border of France and Germany with his brother and Austria around a small fire. Hungary had retired for the night and Bulgaria was in the medical tent, recovering from wounds. Turkey was wandering the woods, terrorizing straggling soldiers.

Prussia was sharpening his sword as Austria wrote some notes in a small notebook. Germany was poking at the fire with a stick, thinking about the battle in the coming dawn.

"If you keep scrunching your face like that, it'll stay that way."

Germany remembers scowling at his brother, who hadn't even looked up from his weapon, which gleamed in the firelight.

"Pardon me for thinking out a strategy," he had replied.

Prussia had shrugged. "You think too much."

"Prussia, leave Germany alone," Austria had scolded.

The albino had looked up. "Mind your own business, specs," he had scowled.

Austria had scoffed, but remained silent.

Prussia had sheathed his sword and set it on the ground. He stood. "Walk with me, West."

Germany frowned at the old nickname, but Prussia was already moving away. The younger blonde hurriedly stood and followed quickly, easily falling into step next to his brother.

"Where're we going?" he had questioned.

The other man had shrugged. "Don't know."

Germany was silent for a few minutes as they walked around the camp and through the woods. When they came to a small clearing, Prussia had begun to climb the small cliff that sat at the top.

"What're you doing?" Germany asked.

Prussia reached the top and stood at the edge, motioning for his brother to join him. Germany scowled and climbed clumsily after him. When the cliff leveled out, he came to stand next to his brother, who was now shorter than the blonde.

Germany sucked in a sharp gasp at the view. The cliff was overlooking their camp, thousands of men sleeping in tents and small fires dotting the ground. Some music floated to his ears, and the sound of laughter quickly followed.

"Look past the camp," Prussia had commanded, pointing to the horizon.

Germany allowed his gaze to travel where the sky met the ground, watching as stars winked at him. A few flashed across the sky.

"One day, all of this will be yours."

The younger looked down to the older.

"What?"

Prussia smiled softly. "All of this," he gestured, arms spread out wide. "It'll all be yours."

"How do you know?" Germany muttered, watching another star shoot across the sky.

Prussia shrugged. "I have faith."

The tall blonde frowned. "That's… reassuring."

The albino smirked. "Hey, you're young, strong, and you got the awesome me behind you! What more could you want?"

"Beer?" Germany asked.

Prussia laughed. It wasn't a chuckle or one of his weird little creepy giggles that he did when he was plotting. No, it was a full laugh from his belly.

"That, mien bruder, is an excellent idea," he had grinned. "I think Turkey's got some stashed away. What'd do you say we toast to victory?"

Germany blushed a little. "We haven't even fought the battle yet, bruder."

"Who cares about that battle?" the older exclaimed. "I'm talking about the war! We're gonna win this thing tomorrow, and then you'll conquer all of Europe!"

Germany remembers, as he followed his brother back to camp and they toasted to tomorrow's battle, the warm feeling he got when Prussia laughed, and made a vow to make sure it happened more often.

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Germany remembers the first time he lost.

He remembers the faces of the Allies as they read off his punishment, the smirk on France's face burning a hole in his head as his brother stood next to him and scowled.

He had messed up, and now he had to pay the price.

And as he walked up to accept his fate, and signed the document to repay France, Prussia grumbled behind him. As the two walked out of the giant palace, and came to the street, they stood facing each other. Germany remembers feeling ashamed.

"Bruder… I'm sorry," he had murmered.

"Hey," Prussia had barked. "What'd I tell you about that? It's-"

"-a sign of weakness," Germany had finished. "I know," he sighed.

"Oye," Prussia said. "Look at me!"

Germany's head had snapped up at the commanding tone, and he stared into his brother's blood-red eyes, seeing determination and confidence in them.

"Don't let this bring you down," the older told him. "Get back on the horse, and show those bastards what you're truly made of!"

Germany gaped. "But, bruder… I can't. They-"

Prussia had smacked him across the face. Germany had staggered back in shock, eyes wide. Prussia glared at him. "I don't want to hear excuses," he snapped. "I want to see results!"

The blonde had continued to stare at him.

"Tsk." Prussia turned on his heel and strode down the road. "I expect something to be done in the near future."

Germany remembers running after Prussia, trying to get his brother to see reason, but feeling the other's confidence already flowing through him and raising his hopes higher than anything else could.

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Germany remembers the first time he and Prussia kiss.

It was after a long day of work, and he had come home to see his brother sitting in his kitchen, three packs of beer on the counter.

"Figured you could use a break," his brother had grinned.

Three hours later, when they were both wasted and sitting on the couch, laughing at nothing in particular. They had started an old argument, but neither could remember what it was about. It had lead to a slight scuffle that ended with both of them on the floor, Germany under Prussia. The Prussian had looked down at him for a moment before leaning forward and catching his brother's mouth in his own.

He had pulled back, licking his lips, as Germany blinked slowly at him, brain trying to catch up with what had just happened.

"That was interesting," the silver-haired man mused.

The two stared at each other for a minute before Germany raised his head and kissed him back.

Germany doesn't remember a lot of that night, just that his brother tasted like beer and wurst, and he liked it.

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Germany remembers the first time they made love.

It's several years after their first kiss, and when Germany is just starting to get stronger. He has a new leader, one who was quickly gaining popularity, and his economy was flourishing under the man's care.

Prussia had stopped by for a visit on his way to France to take care of some business. Germany had managed to convince the other to stay the night. Prussia had taken a shower and was walking around in a towel, hair dripping wet, when Germany came upstairs to get ready for bed. When he had had seen his brother, he blushed.

"Would you put some clothes on?" he remembers asking, blushing.

Prussia had smirked. "Aw, is West embarrassed?"

Germany had scowled, blush increasing. Prussia had grinned and sauntered over to the taller man, swaying his hips.

"Like whatcha see?" he taunted.

Germany's blush continued to increase as the Prussia leaned up to kiss him.

Somehow, Prussia had maneuvered them to the bed and shoved Germany onto of the covers. He smirked and straddled his hips, towel slipping off his slim hips.

"This is gonna be fun," he smirked and leaned down to kiss Germany again.

As his brain finally caught up with what was going on, Germany growled into the kiss and grabbed Prussia by the shoulders. In one quick movement, he had their positions switched, and now he was the one smirking as Prussia glared at him.

"No fair!" the older whined. "I'm older, you don't get to do that!"

"Looks like I just did," the tall blonde teased. He leaned down and captured the albino's pink lips in his own.

Hours later, the two lay on the bed, Prussia wrapped in Germany's arms, both breathing hard.

"That was… awesome," Prussia panted.

Germany had nodded, kissing the back of Prussia's neck.

"I love you," he mumbled into soft, silver hair.

Prussia had turned around in his embrace to place a kiss on the German's lips. "I love you, too," he whispered, eyes sliding shut.

Germany remembers, as they both drifted of to sleep, how prefect Prussia fit in his arms.

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Germany remembers the first time he made Prussia cry.

He was at the height of his power when Prussia had come storming into his house.

"What do you think you're doing?" he snarled, grabbing a handful of the front of Germany's shirt and pulling him down so the two were nose to nose.

Germany had scowled and pushed his brother away, sending a look to Italy and Japan. The two other nations quickly got up and left the room, leaving the brothers alone.

"What are you talking about?" Germany had asked, brushing the wrinkles out of his uniform.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, you fucking brat!" Prussia spat, eyes blazing.

Germany scowled, fixing the cross at his collar.

Prussia growled and gestured to the window. "You're killing all those people! YOUR OWN PEOPLE! MY PEOPLE! Do you have any idea what you're doing?"

"I'm making my country a better place," he replied. "Those people are simply getting in the way of perfection."

Prussia glared at him. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Germany gazed at him, expression unreadable. "If you don't understand, then maybe you shouldn't be here right now."

"Like fuck I shouldn't be!"

Germany refused to budge. "You're either with me, or against me. I would suggest that you side with me."

Prussia looked stunned. "What if I don't?" he spat.

"Then you will suffer the same fate."

The albino stared at his brother, shocked. "Excuse me?"

Germany shrugged nonchalantly.

Prussia's face fell. "What the hell happened to you?" he asked.

Germany shrugged again, picking off an imaginary piece of lint from his sleeve.

Prussia continued to stare the tall blonde, the tension in the air so think that you could cut it with a knife. Finally, the other turned away, covering his eyes with a pale hand. "Oh, mien bruder… what am I going to do with you…?

The German blinked, momentarily shocked out of his uncaring with his brother's odd behavior. "Bruder, what-"

Prussia sighed and turned back to his brother, who was shocked to see a few tears leaking from ruby eyes. He made to step forward, but Prussia stepped away from the outstretched hand.

"I'm going home," he muttered. "Call me if you need anything."

Germany looked at his brother's retreating back in surprise. As he turned to shut the door, Germany noticed the tears rolling down his face. He felt his chest constrict briefly before the door was closed with a loud slam.

Germany remembers the look on his brother's face of pure sadness as he killed thousands of innocent lives, but the promise to stand behind him even through the pain.

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Germany remembers the first time he panicked.

It was after the war, and Germany and Prussia were once again standing before the Allied Powers. Germany had his arm in a sling and was leaning on a crutch, his brother faring no better with gauze covering one eye and arm in a cast. He was standing proud and straight.

America stood in the center of the semicircle. He cleared his throat as he held a piece of paper.

"Germany, you are found guilty of all your charges brought against you. In response to this, you hereby agree to the terms of your punishment as follows…"

As the sandy-haired teen read off the list of things that Germany was now responsible for, he felt Prussia's own, cold hand slip into his own and squeeze gently in reassurance. Germany squeeze back in thanks, attention returning to America as he ended his speech.

"As for the State of Prussia, in regards of the crimes for which you are found guilty, I hereby announce that the Kingdom of Prussia is officially dissolved."

Germany gaped, and next to him, he felt his brother begin to tremble.

"You can't do that!" the tall blonde shouted, an unnatural feeling beginning to blossom in his chest.

"We can," America replied calmly.

"What the fuck?" Prussia screamed, stepping forward, where guards immediately moved forward to block him. "What does that even mean?"

"It means you no longer exist," Russia giggled. "And that you belong to me now."

"WHAT!"

Germany felt bile begin to rise in his throat. "What… do you mean?" he asked, voice calm despite his inner fear.

"The two of you are dangerous together," England supplied coldly. "Therefore, dividing you two is the best option so that nothing of this sort happens again."

"So taking away his military and my fucking country isn't enough?" Prussia snarled, fighting against the guards who held him.

The Allies said nothing. "Prussia, you will go with Russia. Germany, go home." America told them. "This meeting is adjourned."

Germany remembers chaos.

Prussia screamed and slammed his casted arm into the face of one of the guards. He spun, using surprise to catch the other man off guard and punched him in the stomach, kneeing him in the groin as the man bent double. He sprinted back towards Germany, who reached out his uninjured arm, only to be pulled back by three guards. Three more surged forward to restrain the albino, who screamed insults in German and thrashed violently. Behind him, Russia stood with a creepy smile on his childish face.

"Bruder!" Germany called out, trying in vain to get loose.

America and England joined in the fight, helping to push Germany back, as France tried to calm Prussia down enough to not injure himself further.

"Prussia!" Germany screamed, beginning to feel more disheartened the farther away the two brothers got.

When Germany was pushed into the hall and the doors closed, blocking his view of the older nation, he felt terror he had never known before. He remembered tears obscuring his vision as he ran to the giant wooden door and tried to open it, only to find it locked from the inside. He could still hear the German curses and sounds of struggle from the other side.

"Prussia!" he yelled. "BRUDER!"

Germany remembers, as all became quiet except for the sounds of his ragged breathing, the horrifying feeling of being alone for the first time.

000000000000000

Germany remembers the first time he saw the wall.

He remembers staring at the giant structure that had seemed to spring up over night. It stretched the entirety of his border, and was now the only thing that physically separated him from his brother.

He had stood in front of the wall for hours, trying to find a way across, but the only way was either through the checkpoints, which were guarded on either side, or over the top, which was covered in painful barbed wire. The thing was sturdy, and made of impenetrable stone.

He remembers walking along, trying to find weak points, until he heard voices on the other side.

"Hello?" he called. "Can you hear me?"

There was silence, and Germany thought that he had imagined it before a reply drifted over.

"West?"

He remembers his heart skipping a beat. "Prussia?" he called, hopes rising.

"… Prussia doesn't exist, anymore," came the response. "Didn't ya hear?"

Germany remembers his throat tightening. "Then whom am I speaking with if Prussia is gone?"

There was no response, and the tall blonde felt his heart drop. Maybe he had left… maybe it hadn't been his brother at all… maybe-

"I don't know…"

Germany's chest constricted at the soft reply.

"Bruder?"

"… What is it, West….?"

"… How are you?"

"As good as an ex-nation can get."

"…"

"How's Mr. Hamburger and Eyebrows treating you? They giving you any crap? 'Cause if they are, just tell 'em to come over here, and I'll-"

Germany chuckled a little. "I am fine, almost all healed."

"Good, good…"

"Bruder?" Germany asked.

"Hmm?"

"… I miss you…"

"… Me too…"

Germany remembers talking with his brother had never been more awkward, and he vowed that he would find a way to get that damn wall down if it killed him.

000000000000000

Germany remembers when his brother stopped coming to world meetings.

It was the only time the two brothers were allowed any sort of contact, and Germany looked forward to the unorganized mess of those meetings to catch up a little with his brother.

But when Russia strode into the conference room, followed by his two sisters and the Baltics, with no albino man with them, he frowned.

As the meeting came to order, he felt his gaze constantly returning to the empty seat at the end of the table where his brother normally sat. He spared a look at Russia, but the tall Soviet nation was watching America as the teenager gave his speech.

"And we will now hear from Germany regarding the global warming problem in Europe."

Germany started and looked in horror towards the American, caught completely off guard.

"Uh… what?" he asked, feeling heat rise to his ears.

England, who was sitting next to the blonde nation, sighed. "Perhaps it's time for a short recess."

America looked put out, but agreed nonetheless. As the nations dispersed, Germany approached Russia.

"Um…" he stammered. "Where is mien bruder?"

Russia looked down at the German, then gave him a creepy smile. "I'm afraid that, since he is no longer a country, that little East cannot come to these meetings anymore."

Germany felt his anger bubble. "What? You can't do that!"

"Oh, I assure you, I can," Russia rumbled, smile growing. "He may be East Germany, but he is still a part of the Soviet Union, and under my control. One side of Germany fulfills that wish, while me being here for him meets the other half of that requirement."

The blonde German man growled. "Excuse me? What gives you the right to decide what bruder wants and does not want? He's a grown man and can make his own decisions!"

"I'm certain that he cannot," Russia replied. He turned on his heel and walked out of the room.

Germany was standing where the taller nation had left him, hands in fists at his sides as Japan joined him, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"I will talk to America," he said quietly. "What Russia is doing is not right."

Germany nodded and stood still.

He remembers the quiet whispers as Russia left the meeting, with silent promises that justice would prevail.

000000000000000

Germany remembers the day the wall came down.

He remembers the yelling and the screaming and the crying. He remembers scanning the growing crowd, looking left and right for that head of silver hair and red eyes. He remembers the feeling of hopelessness as his eyes refused to pick up the tell-tale signs of his brother.

"West!"

The voice was unmistakable, and Germany whipped his head around, heart fluttering.

There, clambering over people, was his brother, red scarf wrapped around his thin, pale neck. But the smile on his face was heart warming.

"Bruder!"

The two German nations ran towards each other, meeting halfway. They hugged, and Germany felt hot tears seeping through his thin jacket, but his own eyes were blurry as well. After a few moments, they pulled apart, Germany cupping his brother's face as they grinned at each other.

"What'd I tell you about crying?" his brother asked, and Germany grinned, rubbing his thumbs under the pale man's eyes to rid his cheeks of tears.

"Maybe you should head your own advice," he chuckled.

The albino gave a laugh, and Germany's heart fluttered. The two leaned forward and kissed, ignoring the cheers and crowds around them. When they pulled away, Germany leaned his forehead against the other's.

"What happens now?" he asked.

His brother grinned. "How about we start by going home. I don't want to leave that fucking bed for a week!"

Germany laughed and the two stood up, not remembering when they had sunk to the ground, the knees of their pants wet.

"I mean, what happens to you?" he replied as they began the walk back to Germany's house, holding each other's hands, shoulders brushing with each step.

His brother frowned. "What'd ya mean?"

Germany shrugged. "If you're not Prussia anymore, and no longer East Germany… who does that make you…?"

The silver-haired man snorted. "I don't care what they say, I'm always going to be awesome."

Germany chuckled. "That doesn't answer my question."

His brother's eyebrows furrowed as he thought about it. "The wall's still up… the only thing's that changed is that you and I are united… So… I guess we become one nation?"

Germany nodded. "Like the Italies?"

The albino snorted in agreement. "Except we're better."

The tall blonde chuckled. "Ja, bruder. But what do I call you?"

His brother stopped and hopped up in the curb, letting go of the other's hand as he spun around on his heel. When he faced Germany again, he smirked.

"Mien Bruder, just call me by the name I was given at the beginning of time."

Germany felt his heart soar; his brother was still the same, and nothing could change that.

The smaller man spun around again in a full circle and cocked a hip out, pointing a finger to the sky as he grinned wide enough to almost split his face in two.

"Just call me the awesome Prussia!"

Germany remembers, as they lay together for the first time in nearly half a century with Prussia's breaths softly reassuring him, that nothing could ever top this moment.

He remembers red eyes and silver hair, gentle fingers and strong arms, the power of forgiveness and the feeling of belonging for the first time.

He remembers laughs and the feeling of confidence, the devotion despite opposing feelings, moments of beer and wurst and perfection. He remembers blind faith and loyalty.

He remembers feeling alone, feeling awkward, and how he never wanted to feel that way again. He remembers quiet promises.

But most of all, he remembers the presence of Prussia throughout his entire life, how, for every major part of his history, the other man was always by his side. He remembers the love and warmth that was always present with him. He remembers the way everything seemed safe and protected with the other man in his life.

Germany remembers…

* * *

><p>Well, what'dja think? Huh? Huh? HUH!<p>

Lol, sorry, I got a little carried away. I tried to work in a lot of German history, but... it didn't actually work out that way, so I apologize if every thing's beyond historically inaccurate. Some things I know are true, but others... German history is just so COMPLICATED to me... lol.

I really hope you enjoyed this! I love Prussia and Germnacest is my OTP! :D Reviews on this one are greatly appreciated! (No flames, please!)


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